do you spank your kdis when there bad?

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I didn't say it wasn't violence, and yes, obviously, to spank you have to "hit" your child, but "hitting" would mean closed-fist, and I strictly use an open-palm slap on the rear, and nothing more than two strikes, ever. Occasionally, I have pulled the "go outside and pick out your own switch" game on them, but that's more to give us some quiet in the house than to actually spank them. Usually, by the time they get back with the switch that they think will cause them the least amount of pain, they're so knobby-kneed at the prospect of the impending spanking, I give them a light switch on the ass and send them to their room instead. I hate spanking my kids, but sometimes telling them to behave differently doesn't work, and I would be a worse parent to never discipline them than to give them a smack on the ass when they're out of line.
 

BigMattTheHobo

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I'm going to teach my kids to be violent psychotics that get their own way and subjugate the inferior masses.
I fully anticipate needing to give the kid a whack on the butt, but more for getting attention than instilling pain and fear. My dad, for example, never "spanked" me, but on more than one occasion when I was doing/about to do something stupid, I got an open-handed pop on the back of the head. More like a tap than anything, but it is easy for kids to ignore their parents' voices when they hear them all the time, but a rap on the noggin has a way of focusing your attention.
Now this I understand. You're not really being violent to punish, you're doing something slightly shocking to get the kid's attention.

I just don't like the logic of: kid does something bad -> parent punishes kid with violence.
 

chalupa

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Now this I understand. You're not really being violent to punish, you're doing something slightly shocking to get the kid's attention.

I just don't like the logic of: kid does something bad -> parent punishes kid with violence.
I'm pretty sure Dev is saying the same thing as me, but he's got older kids and maybe the open handed tap doesn't do it. I don't know yet.

Actually, I got the little dude in the dome this weekend, but I was actually reaching for the toy he just whacked into the cat's head and was about to smash into the cat again. As I reached across him from where I was sitting, I kinda got his forehead with the base of my palm. It startled me and him both, actually, and he just looked at me, stunned. Then he smiled and giggled, and by then the cat had escaped the onslaught.
 
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For me, spanking is a last resort. If they tell them to stop (not ask, tell), and they don't do it, they've earned themselves a smack on the ass. I don't do it in public either. Say we're in the situation that Neffy witnessed, I think it was a mall, if I tell them to stop, and they don't do it, I will take them them by the hand and walk them all the way back to the car, and 9 times out of ten, that's enough to get them to stop. By the time we get there, I can usually sit them on the seat and tell them what they did wrong and why it was wrong and by that time, they get it, and the spank is unnecessary. However, if we get to the car and they haven't stopped doing whatever it is they were doing, they will get a spanking.

But like I said, not a hit, a smack. I would never hit my kids, ever. My grandpa did that to my dad, and Dad was always sure to never hit me. Of course, his usual form of spanking was with a belt, which I would never do, either.
 

BigMattTheHobo

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I just think there's a clear difference between trying to get your kid's attention when he's so focused on doing something bad he can't/won't hear you and using violence to tell a kid he did something wrong. One is using a small display of violence to stop something in progress, the other is reacting to something that already happened with violence.


Edit: these are just general thoughts and not directed at Dev. I'm not worried about people like him or his kids
 

Fero

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today in the mall i saw this young boy acting like a bad boy in the mall center and i saw his father bend himover the mall bench and started psnaking him right in public!!! i was a little shocked by he was really smacking his butt really hard and iheard the kid cry louder and louder after every smack on the butt and he was really crying people were walking by like nothing happened! i just continued to stare and it was really disturbing seeing the poor boy getting smacked and i want to say that spanking your childrne is wrong! its bad parenting i heard on some abc news article on ther internet that spanking your kids leads to drug abuse drinking alcohol abuse and bad behavior like gang bangs and joining black gangs its really bad, maybe we should start telling kids whats right whats wrong honestly physical abuse leads to bad people. my parents never hit me and they get me whatever i want because im there child and you need to realise that the chance of oyu being alive and your mom having a healthy pregnant is very slim i mean kids in africa are aborted by the millions every day and yet here in america kids are bred like pancakes out of a stoven really sad!
if you smack your kid in the butt face back groin area you need a good smacking yourself iwas about to punch that dad in the face but i just slipped my slurpee and got out of there before things got nasty
I bet your father used to sodomize you with his broken everclear bottles.
 

ennaynattirb

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I just think there's a clear difference between trying to get your kid's attention when he's so focused on doing something bad he can't/won't hear you and using violence to tell a kid he did something wrong. One is using a small display of violence to stop something in progress, the other is reacting to something that already happened with violence.


Edit: these are just general thoughts and not directed at Dev. I'm not worried about people like him or his kids
Every time I've given the oldest a smack on the backside, it's because he's being so defiant that I don't know what else to do... My disciplinary actions typically revolve around taking privileges away for each infraction; but there have been times that I simply don't know what else to do, so I've swatted him just to get him to stop. I think I've cried every time I've done it, which is MAYBE 10 times in his life.
 

BigMattTheHobo

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If you are genuinely interested, I can try to find that info I saw that basically gives you a non violent reaction for a series of problem behaviors
 

kevinsmith

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I'm not a big fan of the spanking=abuse crowd. While excessive spanking is, there's a line that I think is somewhere between "never spank" and "spank the shit out of them."

I can't help but think that the more warm-fuzzy accepting parenting methods become, the more bullshit we get ranging from kids who show up on American Idol and can't sing because parents are taught to never tell their kids they can't do something because it might hurt their self esteem to extreme shit, like school shootings and what not. You never used to hear about stuff like that...why? Could part of it be because kids knew that if they stepped too far out of line long before it came to that, they'd face REAL consequences, not stuff like grounding and talking to and time out and what not. That shit doesn't work.
 

chalupa

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I'm not a big fan of the spanking=abuse crowd. While excessive spanking is, there's a line that I think is somewhere between "never spank" and "spank the shit out of them."

I can't help but think that the more warm-fuzzy accepting parenting methods become, the more bullshit we get ranging from kids who show up on American Idol and can't sing because parents are taught to never tell their kids they can't do something because it might hurt their self esteem to extreme shit, like school shootings and what not. You never used to hear about stuff like that...why? Could part of it be because kids knew that if they stepped too far out of line long before it came to that, they'd face REAL consequences, not stuff like grounding and talking to and time out and what not. That shit doesn't work.
Yes, things were better in the '30s.
 

Nefarious

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I bet your father used to sodomize you with his broken everclear bottles.
i bet your a gay european who sucks shit out of hairy turkish asholes am i correct or am i right? both bitch so why dont you just bend over and accept my cock into your asshole now fag boy europee on fagot
 

chalupa

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i bet your a gay european who sucks shit out of hairy turkish asholes am i correct or am i right? both bitch so why dont you just bend over and accept my cock into your asshole now fag boy europee on fagot
Hi, belly, how you been lately?
 

silberfuchs

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Hi guys, my name is chalupa and I love beating kids. Not just my own, but other peoples' children as well.
 

Nefarious

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why does chalupa hve an obsession with chiwawa dogs? honeslty its to the point of sickening i bet chalupa has asi ck fantasy of fucking dogs in his trailer somewhere in indiana or some redneck dog fucking state like indiana kenfucky and pencildickvania honestly we need something done about this man and i think its time for hcalupa to be banned and shown an example before the rest of the forum is wiped out
 

Nefarious

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That's the best you have? Weak sauce.
your bald you have a pencil dick your ugly short fat and your gay for dogs and gay women yup uour livin the life oh wait no your not honestly i wish your father spanked you eally hard as a child to the point that you were shitting tears
 

chalupa

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your bald you have a pencil dick your ugly short fat and your gay for dogs and gay women yup uour livin the life oh wait no your not honestly i wish your father spanked you eally hard as a child to the point that you were shitting tears
Ouch, my pride.
 
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