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Well, you, sir, are a festizio. See? I can make up words, too.

I tried watching it, I really did. Could not get into it. It insists upon itself.

I meant the Schitt's Creek references. Don't start.

No. Just no.

I'm just a big sweetheart. For real, I've had like 2 one-night stands in my life. The rest have been some connection and then closing the deal. Friends, more than friends...it wasn't like wham bam thank you, ma'am, it was more like we would laugh and play and have a good time. Maybe I'm...

I think she'd have been an idiot NOT to think something, but I stayed friends with every girl I boned except for 2. I can't say I'm CLOSE friends or anything, but like FB friends or if I'm traveling we'll go to dinner and whatnot. I guess there are a few now that I've lost touch with, but if I...

What if we called them "Tragic Mulatto"? I wouldn't have sex with them, if that's what you're worried about. I'm happily sexing someone.

I decided I liked being married so much I'd do it twice. The number of ladies at my first wedding that I had sex with was actually quite impressive. There were at least 7.

Both of them were invited to my first wedding and showed up.

It wasn't at the same time, there was a while between episodes, spanning years. First older, then younger, then back to older. It really was a beautiful story.

One of the few regrets in my life, lol. I think I had two opportunities, but the individual girlies I was with at the time were both really, really drunk, and while they were fucking around with me and their best friends, I think had I pushed it, I would have had to deal with terrible...

1st place. Then 3 at T2, 2 at T5, 2 at T7. By score 4th lowest, but bunch of people ahead. The guy that won, though, beat the T2 by like 5 shots. He's good. The rest of us were bunched.

Thanks. Except it was tied 7th, so by score I was top 4.

7 of 60 ish. Not bad.

Finished tied 7. 3 bad holes, played great other than that. Kids that won is going pro. Different fucking league he's in, man. I'm good, he's tour level.

Today's event is at our country club, yes. We play other places but mostly here. Stiiiill on the course... I'm in 8th. Not bad, a little $$.

Still on the course. Sloooow. I was actually in 2nd against a guy who is turning pro, and I played 3 bad holes. I'm in 6th now. Dammit.